Critical Hockey

Last night, I was talking to a friend about critical mass, that lovely monthly group ride, and about how the better the infrastructure of a city, the smaller the mass, and the whole pointlessness of it.

The pinnacle of this example, is of course, Copenhagen where they have no official critical mass, but in another respect, their much narrower streets manager to accommodate the amount of bicycles on every street that are only in one small area of San Diego.

This reminds me of the Nike commercials where they show other sports are criminalized. For example, tennis players had to hide their rackets when the police came around which just goes to demonstrate that the perception of crime, in sports, is caused by the class of people associated with the sport rather than the sport’s inherent danger to society such as this
Nike Ad.

Meanwhile, how many people think we should ban the true dangers to society like hockey who’s fans cause many more traffic jams than critical mass (each game) and even cause millions of dollars in damage in riots?

So whenever we talk about banning bicycles or critical mass, we should first ban all the other sports which cause more damage.

Now, I’m actually not proposing banning anything, just having a proportional response. I also wonder how awesome it would be to bicycle if we spent the same money for a stadium, the millions of dollars in road additions and improvements to get people to the games, and the excessive amount of money given to law enforcement for each game. We’d be living in a Copenhagen, and there would be no more critical mass. Also, there would be fewer auto accidents and less traffic for motorists.

This brings me to a really brilliant and bizarre rhetorical anti-cycling trick. When backed into a corner, someone who religiously supports motoring at all times even to an absurd point, will call any plans for bicycle improvements “utopian”.

In this regard, they have poisoned the well. Now the cyclist is totally discredited because all the benefits are seen as impossibly unrealistic like a utopia.

Well, I do live in a utopia now–thanks, princess–and I see tomorrow as being even better.


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